“I have a future I know nothing about
A present I don’t want to know about
A past that doesn’t want to know me
I have a friend who cares for me like her own
A family who allows me as its part
A home that lets me be myself
Yet my life remains an unsolved mystery
I know my right and wrong
I know my good and bad
But deep down inside
Is a person who doesn’t care
A person who regards all things as cruel, yet gentle
A person who finds it hard to trust
Hard to love anyone who loves her
She remains alone inside
Always will
Always has

Unless one day she can trust him as he trusts me
Prove that he isn’t like the rest
Who proved themselves not
They lied
Pretended
Failed
The only refuge is purest nature
She cares
Always has
Always will
She shows it in her honest mornings
She shows it in her blossoming messengers
She sings it in her flight of freedom
Reminding me that I am free too
Her star-sprinkled sky
With it’s crescent silver mother
Her baby seeds
And towering trees
Her loving sunshine flowing through the clouds
Pure nature cares
In my innocent mind
Naive thoughts of pixies and fairies and nature spirits
Elves and gnomes and talking animals
Together as one in a world all my own
where only I can go
When only I want to go
A world cleaned of impurities
Because I don’t know they exist

A world all my own
In my own imagination
No-one can take it from me
But that is all that my world is
Mine
I can never share it because it isn’t really there
What use is something beautiful If it can’t be shared?
Only he who prove his trust can share it
Only he who looks inside
And loves what he finds
(If he can find it)
Can share it
Or is he also just another imagined being…
Is there really one who has only pure intentions…
One who means what he says
And says what he means
Or am I alone forever?
Will she ever emerge from my depths?
Who is she?
Why isn’t she always there?
Who takes her place?
Only I should know
But I don’t”

1994